My Dad

I've been thinking about my dad a lot today since today would have been his 88th birthday.  Since his death was so close to my diagnosis and the whirlwind of emotions and activity that set off, I sometimes feel that I never really went through a grieving process for him.

The events of last February were just so bad.  Let's recap--

February 1--my father-in-law passed away
February 7--my father-in-law's funeral
February 14--my first appointment with Dr. Levin
February 18--my father passed away
February 23--my father's funeral
February 25--Dr. Levin calls me with the diagnosis of Amyloidosis
February 28--my first appointment with Dr. Efebera

Wow, I've never spelled it out like that before.  That's a lot of tragedy jam-packed into the shortest month of the year.

I came back from my dad's funeral on a Sunday and Monday after work is when Dr. Levin called me with my diagnosis.  He called me while I was driving home from work (I was just approaching the 33 exit on I-270) and he said something like, "I wanted to let you know that I have a diagnosis.  It's a condition called Primary Amyloidosis.  Its very rare and I'm not really sure to whom I should refer you.  I have some calls and emails out.  I'll call you tomorrow and let you know what I find out."

I called Alan and when I got home, we were both on our laptops, furiously searching the internet for information.  Bad move!  The Google searches for Primary Amyloidosis gave the impression that there was no hope and I was looking at surviving about 4 years or so.  It really distracted my attention from my dad's death and firmly focused it on what I believed to be my own impending death.

So today I've been thinking about the many lessons my dad taught me and the great memories I have of him.  And I'm thankful for a future that is very different from the one I thought I was facing last February.